This will cheer you up after another Pirates loss

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Well. Let’s be honest, no matter how you analyze it, The Pirates are terrible. So instead of wondering how to make them a better team, why not watch some of these videos. They will make you feel a little better and don’t worry after you’re done watching them, the Pirates will still suck.

Do Unto Others: Messing With People In A Public Restroom

This one’s good. The best part is when the guy shares the urinal with the other guy!

The guy at the 24 second mark is hilarious! I think I may do some of these tomorrow at the gym!

I don’t know what it is about fart jokes. It doesn’t matter how old I get, I still think it’s hilarious!

I saved the best for last! Check out these job interview tactics. My son Cory graduates from Penn State next month, I’m going to let him know about how to act during his next job interview!

Ok. That’s enough of that. Now let’s see if the Pittsburgh Pirates are still a terrible team. Uh, yep. . . . They are, told you they would be.

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Pens and Sens, Big Ben, And Pirates at .500 After Ten!

by me 23:36, 26 May 2007 . . Conk 9 . .
Image via Wikipedia

I know I haven’t wrote much on here lately. I have been very busy with my other blog, Fitness Overhaul and to be honest am a little disgusted with the whole sporting world recently. I had a bunch of stuff that I was going to write about the Pirates sucking and instead of them sucking, they are actually doing pretty decent.

I was going to write about the Pens and Crosby being the best player, but I’ve been told that I write too much about Crosby. That being said, he’s one of the reasons that the Pens and Sens are tied at one game a piece. Also, I would like to say to the rest of the so called fans out there, Get off of Fleury’s back! If it wasn’t for him, we wouldn’t of one the Stanley Cup last year. I love listening to armchair goalies that are probably more nonathletic than Mark Madden, call in to radio shows saying how bad number 29 is. Give me a break, guys. Who really cares about the guys stats, he’s still a winner. I know that he lets in some soft goals, but what goalie doesn’t?

For all of the Fleury bashers out there, who do you think that the Flyers or even the Caps would like to have in the net for their team? If you asked them to switch goalies, they would do it in a heartbeat.

Ok, on to Ben. I really don’t even know what to say about this guy anymore. I know he can throw a football, but beyond that, he hasn’t showed that he can do much of anything else good. Like function as an adult and be a productive part of society, maybe?

Who knows what this guy will do next. Of course, I don’t know what really happened in that bathroom. As it turns out with how drunk that girl was, she may not even know for sure. The one thing that I do know is that this guy has a history of putting himself in stupid situations. I hope that he can get his act together and concentrate more on football and less on partying.

Oh well, that’s my take on sports in Pittsburgh this past week or so. Lets go Pens! Lets go Buccos! And Ben, please just stay in the house for awhile!

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Bucco’s Win, Holy Shit, The Bucco’s Win!

Pittsburgh Pictures, Images and Photos

Well, as much as I have been pounding the Pirates ownership on this blog, I have to give the Pirates credit. They actually played like a team today, pitched decent, and even produced some offense.

Who would of thought?

Owner Bob Nutting, was quoted as saying, “What’s up now bitches? All you guys said that we couldn’t play winning baseball. We’re at 1.000%, we are winners! It’s been an amazing run and an incredible year!

I felt embarrassed for him whenever someone told him that the year is actually just beginning. He said, “Well what about all of those other games we played down in Florida earlier? They have to count for something, don’t they?

What a sad, sorry, little man.

Oh well, good job Buccos. You are undefeated! Where do we buy playoff tickets at?

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It’s Official, The Pittsburgh Pirates Have No Hart!

Well, I guess anyone that has followed the Pirates this spring would know that it was inevitable. The Pirates cut struggling pitcher, Kevin Hart this past week. He had an ERA this spring of 15.43 and walked 17 batters in the eight innings that he pitched.Sports Fan unhappy

This is going to be a familiar sight at the Pirate games again this year. Hey, Hey, Hey, Buccos go all the way!

Big deal, they should of kept him. He was the only chance that the Pittsburgh Pirates had at having a “heart” this year. It’s moves like this that make you wonder what they are up to. If they want to continue to suck year after year, they are going to need guys like Kevin Hart. If they were smart they would try and get Derek Bell back in the lineup. Remember how pissed we were whenever he said that he was on “operation shutdown”?

Little did we know back then, that the Pittsburgh Pirates as an organization were also on “operation shutdown”! In a way you have to give them credit though. It’s not easy being this bad for this long. You really have to work at being such a joke for so long. You figure with the law of numbers, eventually they would win at least one game over .500. Nope, not them. They are real winners when it comes to being losers!

So earlier, the Pirates were looking at Church and Jesus and know it’s official they will play with no Hart.

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That’s What I Get For Trying To Watch The Pirates!

Lady GaGa Pictures, Images and Photos

Don’t ask me why, but I actually tried to watch the Pirate exhibition game today. I was wading through endless receipts getting ready to see my accountant on Friday for tax time. I figured while I was going to be stuck in the house all day getting more and more frustrated about how much money we give the IRS, why not let the Pirates make it even worse? I couldn’t even watch the stupid game because it was canceled due to rain! Oh well, I doubt that we missed much.

Instead I watched Lady Gaga in London. She’s kind of a whackadoo, but during the interview, she actually talked a little normal. I guess after seeing her perform on a few shows and videos, I just figured her head would start spinning and she would start talking in tongues! She’s one of those people that even while you’re looking at them, you still don’t know what they look like. I can’t really tell if she’s hot or just a whackadoo. I’m leaning towards wackadoo, though. Although she could be a hot wackadoo, but I’m not sure.

I think as the Pirate season starts and progresses, I’ll probably rather watch Lady Gaga more. It’s kind of like beer goggles at a bar. Instead of the alcohol making the girls look better, the Pirates will make anything seem like a better choice, even Lady Gaga!

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Here’s Why We Hope Big Ben’s Innocent!

Well, as you can expect the media is all over the newest Big Ben development. We all have our opinions and take on what may have happened at that night club in Georgia, but none of us really know the truth. Until we find out what happened and what’s going to happen to Ben, let’s just hope for the best.

Here are a few videos that show some of his greatest moments on the field. I just wish he was as good off the field as he is on it!

The Great “Big Ben” Roethlisberger

Here’s more of his greatest escapes:

Ben Roethlisberger // Superman

This video is really good and has some clips with him shooting clay pigeons with Brett Kiesel, talking about the first allegations against him, and how Charlie Batch has helped him become a better leader.

E60 with Ben Roethlisberger

Hopefully, this whole situation comes out that Ben Roethlisberger is innocent. This guy has done so much in so little time and I can’t imagine how good he will be as the years go on. Let’s just hope we get to see it happen.

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The Big Ben Soap Opera Continues!

Pittsburgh Steelers quarterback Ben Roethlisbe...
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I know that we are all innocent until proven guilty and we don’t really know what happened with Ben Roethlisberger this time, but. . . . Am I the only one that is getting tired of the drama? Holy shit does this guy know how to make the news or what?

If it’s not almost killing himself on a motorcycle with no helmet, it’s getting accused by what seems like every girl that he interacts with. Let me say that I am not judging the guy and his personal life and I love the way he plays quarterback. There comes a time though when you are going to be considered guilty whether you did the crime or not. I already see the public’s view of Big Ben going down since the last time he was accused. He can come through this as clean as a whistle, but there will still be some people that will have their doubts about him. Read the rest of this entry »

Sidney Crosby Proves Again Why He’s One Of The Best

The Stanley Cup.

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So is Sidney Crosby the best player on the ice? After taking a few days to get over the loss to Canada, I am finally ready to give my take on it. I’ve talked to several people that are really upset that it was Crosby that scored the goal in overtime to beat the United States in Men’s Olympic hockey.

I on the other hand am not upset at all. Sid has to come back and gear up for the last twenty games of the NHL season and hopefully a deep run in the Stanley Cup playoffs. Would you rather him, Gonchar, Fleury and Malkin all come back losers? Especially with the enormous expectations that were put on Sid, he will definitely come back in a better frame of mind than if they would of lost.

Don’t get me wrong, I wanted the USA team to win regardless, but at least this is a way to lessen the pain of losing. In the beginning of the games, very few people thought that we would make it very far and what they did, far exceeded most people expectations. I know that the US team expected to win, but most others didn’t. I congratulate Team USA for how great they did, and I have even more respect for Ryan Miller after watching these Olympic games.

I’m ready for the NHL games to start for the Pens tomorrow and get back to normal. I think if the United States wasn’t going to win, then I wouldn’t of wanted it any other way. Besides, just think how much you would of hated it if we were playing Russia for the gold and Ovechkin got the winning goal! Now that would of really been hard to take! Great job, Sidney. Let’s go Pens, how about another Stanley Cup!!!!

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Ryan Miller Plays Out Of His Mind As USA Beats Canada

Ryan Millers Goalie Mask

Wow! What a great hockey game! Ryan Miller was just sick tonight with some of his saves. If you didn’t watch the game tonight as Team USA wins 5-3 against Canada, you missed a hell of a game!

Nice to see Sidney Crosby get a goal, but even nicer to see a USA team that hardly anyone gave a chance to go 4-0 with 8 out of 8 points so far.

Great job, USA and great job Ryan Miller. Can’t wait to see how this will play out in the later rounds.


Russia won today too, which is only going to give them even more confidence and if we see Canada again, they are going to have a huge chip on their shoulder. It’s not going to get any easier, that’s for sure. Let’s just enjoy what they’ve done so far because according to most of the experts, we weren’t supposed to be this good.

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The Pirates Are Going To Shit In Your Livingroom Again.

View of Downtown Pittsburgh from PNC Park
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As Pirates spring training gets under way and I try to muster a little bit of enthusiasm about the coming year, I can’t help but think of a dog I used to have called “Buddy”. Let me tell you a little about this dog and explain why the Pirates are so similar to him.

As it is any time you get a new pet, our relationship with Buddy started out with great enthusiasm and happiness. “What a cute puppy!” . . . “He’s going to be a great dog!” . . . “I’m so glad we finally got another dog!” These were all things that could be heard in my house the first few days of having Buddy. Well, it all went down hill from there.

Buddy was the biggest pain in the ass, destructive, nightmare of a dog that was ever conceived. No matter how many chew toys, you got him, he loved to chew anything that was of any value in our house. If we put him in his crate while we were away for a few hours, he would piss in it. I’m pretty sure that dogs are hardwired not to do this! If you opened the door even a crack, he would do his best to knock you down so he could get out and roll in anything that was dead. We had him for a year and after he knocked my wife down the steps while she was 8  months pregnant, because he heard a knock on the door, we took him back to the Humane Society. There was a lot of training and attempts to teach this dog to not act this way, so in case some dick from PETA tries to say that we shouldn’t of gave him back, don’t bother.

” I can’t stand that dog!” . . . “Please, can we get rid of him?” . . . “This dog is possessed by demons!” These were all things that could be heard after living with Buddy for a year.

So, back to why Buddy and the Pirates are so similar. In my mind a dog, or any pet for that matter, is supposed to bring joy and happiness in to your life and your household. This dog brought nothing but misery. The Pirates or any other sports team should also bring you happiness. They should be fun to watch, fun to go and see play live, and not piss you off every time you hear about their latest sorry ass roster move.

You need to love, feed, groom, and provide a nice place for your dog to live.

Using the Buddy = Pirates metaphor, you need to love (Support the team), feed (Buy tickets and go to the games), and provide a nice place for the Pirates to live (PNC Park paid for by the taxpayers!) As with Buddy, we have done our part and whenever it got unbearable, we got rid of him. We gave him back to the Humane Society in hopes that someone that was better skilled at living with dogs from hell, could do a better job than we were doing.

Well, haven’t we been doing our part for the Pirates? Haven’t we done all of the things above? We still go to the games even though we know what the results are going to be. The Pirates play in the greatest ball park in MLB, and some of us suckers, still hold out hope that this year is going to be different and maybe they can win. After 17 losing seasons and no end in site, can we please get someone better skilled at running a Major league team? We don’t want to get rid of the Pirates, we just want ownership that is better at leading the Pirates out of this nightmare.

Just like Buddy, we keep believing that things are going to change. . . . Just like Buddy, the Pirates keep shitting in the corner of the living room.

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