After seventeen straight losing seasons in a row, the Pittsburgh Pirates are looking to Church and Jesus for help next year! I can’t say as I blame them, most of the fans in Pittsburgh have been praying for a winning season for years. It’s about time that Pirates ownership finally tries something new.

Before you get too excited and pull your WWJD bracelets out of the drawer, you need to know that it’s not the real Jesus, Its Jesus Brito. Yeah, he’s a minor league infielder from the Cleveland organization. As with anything the Pirates do, they can’t even get the real good Jesus! As far as Saviors go, he’s the only Jesus that the Pirates are willing to sign. If you want to know what would Jesus do? (WWJD) He would most likely play for the Yankees or Red Sox! Even the real Jesus knows he can’t save a sinking ship.

On a brighter note, the Pirates also have a Church in the organization now. This should make some people feel good going to a game on Sunday this year. Seeing Jesus and Church together on Sunday at the ballpark may be as close to worshiping as some fans will get. Ryan Church is an outfielder that was with Atlanta last year. He has had injury problems through the years, but when healthy, is a pretty good ball player. Maybe if he gets injured again this year, he could look to Jesus for healing.

While searching for information on baseball players names, I came up with a few that sound like they should be in a 70’s porno movie. These guys were all real major league baseball players and these are their real names!

Johnny Dickshot: played for the Pirates from 1936-1938

Rusty Kuntz: won a world series with Detroit in 1984

Charlie Fuchs: pitcher for the Detroit Tigers in 1942

Well that’s all for now, folks. Don’t know how I did it, but somehow I referenced Jesus, the church, and old porno movies all in the same post!